I've made this blog where I'm going to post 'Working-Writing-Samples' to see which one is best and what I need to change in them, so that's why I'm asking for your help, you can comment anyway you like, though I wouldn't like you saying it's bad I still want you to be honest.
Thanks Minna~
First Sample
“Are you sure this is right?” a strong male voice was heard from behind the desk covered with old papers, letter, documents, files, pens/pencils and a small hole from a small knife that was stabbed into it out of anger. The man’s face was covered by the darkness while the rest of his body and clothes were visible by the tiny light coming from the flickering candle. “Yes…” another voice was heard at other side of the desk. Although this time it was a young boy’s voice. The boy was standing tall to show his determination for his request. His face would have been shown if it wasn’t for the hood he was wearing. His whole body and clothes were covered by the black cloak he was wearing. “Very well,” the man spoke, “I shall allow this but I urge you to be careful.” “I understand…” the boy spoke heading to the door. “One question,” the man said making the boy stop and turn to face him. “Why are you doing this?” the man asked, leaning back against his chair, “I mean, why are you doing this for him?” There was a moment of silence before he boy stepped forward, towards the desk, into the light showing a tiny bit of his face, “I have my reasons….”
Second Sample
"Any word?" asked a young boy with dark blue-black hair and eyes. He was wearing a red long sleeve shirt with long dark green pants. He was standing next to a young girl, around his age. She had long purple hair, blue eyes and was wearing a violet short sleeve shirt with a flower pattern on it, along with a grey skirt that reached below her knee caps. "None yet..." another boy, in the same room, spoke. He had long green hair, tied up in a ponytail. He was wearing a brown robe, like the ones that monks wear, with a small brooch that was the shape of a leaf. From what was seen from his clothes; he was wearing a long sleeve purple shirt with a knit-like collar. He also wore long dark blue pants. "Then we should go over there and help them!" the pink haired boy shouted out while standing up from his seat. He was wearing a little red short sleeve shirt with a grey scarf, hanging from his neck, and black baggy pants. A pink fluffy tail was slowly wagging behind him. His pink spiky hair was hiding his wolf ears. "It's not that easy..." the green haired boy said back. The pink wolf boy groaned and sat back down in his chair with his arms crossed. There was a moment of silence until another new voice was heard. "So..." the voice came from the boy leaning in the far corner, "we wait?" The green haired boy nodded, "we wait..." The pink haired boy did not look happy by the 'team's' choice but he sighed and followed the agreement. One by one the 'people' left the room, leaving it to seem like an empty hole in the wall. They went their separate ways, down dark halls, through gloomy doors and into the unknown...
Third Sample
Separated from the group; Mark Evans continued running. He had forgotten what he was running from but he kept running because of one voice in his head, saying: “Go Evans! Get Out Of Here!” The voice wasn’t his though he couldn’t remember whose voice it was either. Mark wasn’t able to see much of his surroundings as they flew past him in a blur. The sound of crunching leaves and snapping twigs were heard under his feet. Mark glanced back to see what or who was chasing him, if there was anything chasing him. While glancing back Mark didn’t notice the log up ahead which he eventually stumbled over. Behind the log was a high slope that lead into the unknown. Stumbling over the log, Mark rolled down the slope; receiving cuts and bruises.
Upon reaching the bottom of the slope Mark laid there for a moment, surrounded by dark trees, dead bushes, fallen leaves and broken twigs. He groaned before deciding to get up. Once he stood up he felt an agonizing pain in his left ankle. He supported his weight on a nearby tree before realizing he had twisted it. “Damn….” he said wondering what to do now.
A dreadful howl was heard from the top of the slope. Without looking, Mark Evans forced himself to keep moving. He limped through this new environment, glancing back every time the dreadful howl was heard. The pain soon became so unbearable that he collapsed to the ground, clutching his ankle.
“Come on Mark…” he said to himself, trying to get up, “you can do this…argh…” The sound of slow cracking twigs and crunching leaves was heard not far from him. He then realised he was in big danger and tried harder to get up. The cracking and crunching was getting closer and louder by the second. Not looking back, Mark continued to try and get up but luck wasn’t on his side. He reached for a branch from a nearby tree to help him stand but the branch broke off straight away, sending Mark back to the ground. He groaned in pain and shut his eyes as he hit the floor. The pain in his ankle had become even worse now. He wasn’t sure if he was going to make it.
Mark forced his eyes to open when he felt the vibrations from what was chasing him. He shut his eyes again, when hearing the bloodcurdling howl. The cracking and crunching had turned into loud footsteps walking right to hm. Mark was now shaking in fear, hoping and wishing this wasn’t the end as he felt the chaser’s breath on his skin. He covered his ears when his chaser let out another bloodcurdling howl. Mark slowly opened his eyes, coming face to face with his chaser.
